I need to start by telling you I am a dog person. If only by proximity. We have 4 dogs, all rescue animals. My neighbor has dogs. 5 of them, not counting the puppies.  His neighbor has 4 rescue dogs. Another neighbor has 3 small, funny looking, dogs. Yet another one has 2 pit bulls. and somewhere behind me are two loud dogs. We are one SAFE neighborhood, let me tell you. I am not going to mention that we have a grassy island that goes down the center of the road in front of us, that might as well be marked "Neighborhood Dog Toilet" but we do.

Anyway I've got a few kids and their friends who hang around and they have become the unofficial "dog patrol" for the neighborhood; rounding up escapees, locating lost pets and just basically making friends with all the local barketry. All of the neighborhood dogs generally love them all and listen to them well. Except one who is older, a little deaf and a bit of a snob. She sees them coming and huffs at them as she turns and takes off. On the other hand she seems to adore me. Maybe it is because we are about the same size. But it is okay because that's just Jo as we all say. Except me I say something closer to "that g*dd**n, hairy, horse, what the f**k is her problem?" but we love Jo. Especially my 4 lb. female Maltese, but that's another story.

So not long ago my daughter acquired a "puppy" that weighed 47 lbs and wasn't leash trained yet. We were in the process of accomplishing said training one day when we noticed Jo walking down the street neat as you please. My daughter stayed inside while I headed out.

Of course I had to go after her before she got hit by a car or something else she snubbed as inferior. I caught up to her easily as she turned and saw me and came running, knocking me on my ass and drooling all over me in the process. After I got up and brushed myself off we headed back home, Jo in front and me holding her tail (she wasn't wearing her collar).  As we got to our house I let go and she headed around the corner and to her fence I assumed.

Wrong! In the meantime my daughter had decided to go ahead and bring her dog out. Her dog took one look at Jo and completely lost her mind, my daughter screamed and bee-lined for the door dragging the hysterical dog behind her. I came pell-melling around the corner to grab Jo, who had actually just stopped dead wondering what was gong on. Now her back comes up to my mid thigh so I ran right into her and executed a half gainer with a 3/4 twist over her back landing on my back in a pile of gravel with a fistful of dog hair.

As I came to my senses I looked up and I saw our neighbor, a crusty old scudder, staring at me open mouthed, my daughter standing on the steps not very successfully stifling a horse laugh and Jo still standing in the same place a stoic look on her face. Neighbor finally managed a strangled "Are you okay?" as my still giggling daughter help me up and Jo trotted off and went back through the gap in the fence she escaped from.

As the neighbor retreated and I stumbled up the stairs swatting at my STILL giggling daughter I gave a great deal of thought to becoming a cat person.